Shifting Patterns
by MoeMoe2000
Summary: Nita Klimek moves to La Push, which she makes sure everyone knows was against her will, and unfortunate for her is attracted to a certain werewolf. Even if he has a girlfriend. What's in store for this complicated girl? You'll find out. Brady/OC Collin/OC
1. Chapter 1

**Hiya! Okay so this is like my first (well second) fan fic so pleese go easy on meh! I do NOT own ANY twilight characters just Nita and Keanu and… well… everyone you haven't heard about! **** I'll try to post every week… or sooner! This first chapter MIGHT be a little slow but I have to introduce the situation **_**and**_** Nita first so bare with me till chapter two… that's all…. Wait! No….**

**Remember: review and you might get a preview! Okay…. I think that's it… **

**Love,**

**Your favorite author in training,**

**Gabby**

I watched as the bright, colorful lights of the city sped out of view only to be replaced by misty, thick, green forests. I subconsciously fiddle my dad's old dog tags that hung loosely from my pale brown colored neck. **[A/N: the pale brown color is also called **_**Fallow. **_**Wiki it.]**

"You alright, sis?" Keanu asked turning to look at me from his shotgun seat.

"Of course she's alright," snapped my mother. Still, Keanu's light brown eyes did not leave my dark ones. I gave one small nod to my brother before turning to look out the backseat window, again.

Keanu let out a long, frustrated breath, and I didn't have to look to know that he was running a hand through his straight black hair that of-so-often got into his eyes. That was officially the end of that conversation. The most common topic for small-talk was about the weather but none of us went into that. In Washington it was almost always grey.

After a few more minutes in the car we finally reached our destination, La Push Rez. It was a decision made without me. A decision that we would move from Massachusetts to the secluded area of La Push, Washington. We left everything behind for this. A chance to start over, a fresh start, starting with the blue and white house that was now in front of me.

Keanu knocked on the car window interrupting my train of thought. I looked up at him with exasperated eyes. Seeing my silent question he motioned for me to follow. Sighing, I opened the door, got out, and slammed it. It was no secret that I didn't like this idea. At all. Keanu shot me a look that screamed, 'Please behave yourself.' I just rolled my eyes and stomped past him, my brown, curly-at-the-end hair gently blowing behind me by a soft breeze.

Once I reached the door I wasn't surprised that Keanu easily caught up to me.

"Ready?" he asked with his hand over the door knob.

No.

"Yes."

"Are you _sure?" _he asked.

No.

"Yes, now open the damn door already!"

He looked at me from the corner of his eye with smiling eyes, and gave a dramatic pause.

"C'mon!" I laughed.

Keanu chuckled and pushed open the door. Slowly we both walked in. I was only faintly aware of the door closing. From somewhere behind me Keanu mummerd, "Welcome home."

I didn't respond. I think it will take a while before I ever called it that.

On my way toward the stairs I caught a glimpse of my mother in the kitchen. She had a beer bottle in one hand, and her straight brown hair was tied in a messy bun. Her look was completed with sweats and she was looking out the window. My mom and I were never close but I know dad's death and moving back to her childhood town must be hard on her. Even though I didn't like her, I allowed myself to feel a little pity for her and then without looking back I continued my trek up the stairs.

Numbly, I continued to my new 'room' and cautiously opened the door afraid of what I would find. Though once I looked in I realized I shouldn't be. The walls were a faded beige color, with a closet, and a white vanity table and mirror, and on the other side of the room was a queen bed with white sheets, cream pillows and blankets. There was a bedside table with a vase of yellow roses in it. I kind of liked the theme. It was simple, and even more I loved the window even though a tree blocked some of the view.

My boxes were already next to my bed. Still dazed, I picked one up and plopped it on the bed, before opening it. In the box were some of my favorite things, mostly pictures of my dad, and my older brother Derek. Derek was twenty-four and my favorite brother but like my dad used to be, he was in Iraq. I just hoped he didn't end up having the same fate.

Slowly, I pulled out a picture of Derek in his army uniform and placed it on my bedside table along with a glass figurine of a wolf my dad gave me on my eighth birthday. I picked up a few more pictures. One with me and Derek laughing and covered in mud. It was one of my favorite memories. It was around August at Lake Ontario, where we rented a cabin.

Looking at the photograph, I crossed over to the other side of the room and placed it on the vanity table along with the other three pictures. One was when I was fourteen and Derek took me to a museum. I was bored out of my mind, I remember that. The other was the leave before dad died. We were at a beach by our home in Cape Cod. It was a cloudy day and the waves were violent, crashing on the surface, but it was nice. It wasn't often that dad came home. The third picture was of me and Keanu when we were little, and innocent. I think we were around five or six and it was taken on our first day at day care.

I went back over to my bed and folded the now empty box and threw it into the trash. The second box was bigger but three times lighter. Opening it up, I found all my clothes and folded them and hung them neatly in my closet.

I opened the third and last box, and found all my bathroom stuff. Luckily, in this house, I had my own bathroom connected to my room. I closed the box again and carried it over to the bathroom before putting it down on the white stone countertop. The bathroom was relatively small but had a shower on one end a countertop with a sink, a mirror and a toilet. The shower curtains were cream colored and the floor was made of a light tan wood.

Opening the cardboard box, I pulled out a mug that I placed next to the sink and putt my toothpaste and toothbrushes in. Along with shampoo and conditioner that I placed in the shower, and my brush that I put in one of the two drawers. Satisfied, I walked out of the bathroom and glanced at the clock.

It was only 5:30 but I think I could use a little nap. Not bothering to put on PJs I climbed into my bed and fell asleep.

**[A/N: I know, a little boring but it'll get more interesting, by the next day I promise! For now, read on.]**

__Next Day_

The loud, metallic sound of my alarm clock woke me up. I have to say it was the first morning that I felt really great. The bed was just really comfy because I am not a morning person. There was a strange noise and it took me a second to realize it was a knock on the door.

"What?" I groaned. Cautiously, the door opened and Keanu's head peaked through.

"It's time to get up," he announced, "and a friend of mine is going to come pick us up."

"Friend? When'd you get any friends?" It sounded ruder than I meant it but seriously we haven't even been here for a day.

Keanu slightly smiled.

"I went into town after you fell asleep and met a few more locals."

I nodded. That made sense.

"Alright," I told him, "I'll get up."

Keanu smiled more widely showing a little of his teeth.

"You have ten minutes to get ready," he warned, "Though," he said looking me up and down, "It looks like you already did."

Following his gaze I looked down and groaned again. I fell asleep with my clothes on. Keanu chuckled and shut the door behind him. Defeated, I picked myself up and crossed the room toward the closet, to change into something different. I picked a maroon red long sleeve shirt and my favorite jeans, topped off with moccasins.

In the bathroom one look in the mirror told me my hair was going to be easy to manage today, and after running my brush through it I ran out of the bathroom, grabbed a black scarf, and headed out of my bedroom and down the stairs, and walked into the kitchen.

"Here you go."

My brother handed me a piece of toast and I gratefully accepted it.

"Your bags over there," he gestured with his head because he was washing dishes. I acknowledged it and turned back to him.

"Where's mom?" I asked but deep down I already knew.

"She went to Seattle for the week."

I nodded even though he couldn't see me. I felt traitorous tears begin to form and I stubbornly pushed them back, determined not to let her get to me.

"You alright?"

"Ya," I lied.

"Well good," he glanced at the clock and cursed. "We got to go. Grab your bag."

I walked over to my bag and swung it over one shoulder, and fallowed Keanu out the door.

Sure enough there was a Toyota right in front of our house. Keanu waved at however was in the driver's seat. We continued to the Toyota and the passenger seat's window rolled down.

The driver had a huge, happy grin on his face and dimples. He reminded me of a puppy. Keanu got in on the passenger side and I opened the back door and climbed in.

"Hi, I'm Seth," he introduced himself.

"Nita," I said warily with a nod.

"Seth is a senior, too," explained Keanu, "We have a few classes together."

"Who?" I asked half-heartedly. I didn't really care, I was a junior.

"Mr. Simpson, math, Mrs. Polly, history, and Mr. Jackson, P.E."

I nodded and looked out the window. We got our schedules in the mail a day before we left.

"You guys are really going to like it here," reassured Seth, "We even have a gang."

"Gang?" I piped up. That was the most interesting news I've heard.

Seth laughed.

"Nope. Just seeing if you were paying attention."

"Oh." I said disappointed.

"Don't be so disappointed," scolded Keanu and Seth laughed again, and the car stopped.

"Why'd the car stop?" I asked worriedly.

"Because we're here."

I looked out the window and sure enough, there was La Push High.

"That fast?" I asked more to myself, and it was to quite for anyone to hear.

"Yup, everything's spitting difference away," Seth answered. We almost anyone.

I didn't realize the two boys got out of the car until Keanu asked, "You coming Nita?"

"Ya," I called back to him and hopped out of the car. I was warily walked toward the school, into the building, and to my new locker. Turning my code, I put my discarded notebooks and binders into the cold metal storage.

"Hi," a girly voice came from my right. I moved my locker door so I could see who it came from.

"I'm Sarah Archer,' the girl said holding out her hand and I shook it. Sarah had short curly hair that barely reached her shoulders and she was the same 5"7 height as me. Her skin had a little more golden-ness to it, though.

"Nita."

"I know."

I must have looked at her funny because she hurriedly tried to correct herself stumbling over her words a little.

"I meant, it's a sm-small town-n and we don't get a-lot of new people—"

"It's all right," I reassured her, laughing.

"Good," she breathed, "Who's you first class?"

"Jenkins, English."

"I do to!" she squealed. I smiled at her.

"Well," she decided, "I better catch you up on everything La Push. See that girl over there?" I fallowed to where she was pointing. A girl who must have been around 5"4 was scribbling something in her notebook, her straight hair tied back in a low ponytail.

"Ya."

"Her name's Mira. She's a freshman and, like, the smartest kid in this entire school."

I nodded, impressed. Just then two tall girls walked to a locker close to Mira.

"Who are they?" I asked.

"The tall one that's sort of pale? That's Jennifer Birmingham. And her follower's name is Liz Malik."

The way Sarah said their names it was obvious that there was little respect there. I'd have to ask for the scoop later.

"Not your type?" I joked.

Sarah barked out a laugh, "No, but her boyfriend over there is." She nodded to some guys down the hall, and my jaw dropped open. The guys were hot. Like really hot. And they looked like they could be body builders.

"Which ones that?" I asked gesturing to one with cropped black hair, and russet skin. He wasn't the strongest guy there but he looked close. Sarah giggled.

"Ya, that's Jennifer's boyfriend. Brady." She giggled again. Almost as if hearing his name Brady looked over at us and his hazel eyes caught mine. Almost imminently I felt a warmth spread through me and my belly irrupted into a million butterflies which was not normal behavior for me. I quickly looked away and the bell saved me for any further embarrassment.

"C'mon," urged Sarah. She linked arms with me, and we started walking to class when a male voice interrupted us.

"Sarah!"

"That's Collin," Sarah whispered to me, "act cool."

I could tell she liked him and we both turned around. I was surprised to see Brady behind Collin and my heart jumped in my chest. Only a little.

"Can we walk with you?" asked Collin with the silliest smile on his face and I bit my lip from laughing. It took every ounce of my being not to look and see what Brady was doing, or if he was looking at me.

"Uh…" Sarah stuttered, and I elbowed her in the side.

"Uh… ya," Sarah quickly regained herself, "Sure! This is Nita."

"Hi," I said and smiled my Mona Lisa smile I was oh-so famous for at my old school.

"Hi," Collin said at the same time Brady did. I smiled a little more at hearing Brady's voice. Even if it was covered by Collins it was still deep, and husky, and absolutely mesmerizing from the first syllable to the last. Yup, I got that from one word.

"Are you single?" asked Collin, abruptly, with a quick glance I almost missed, to Brady. Sarah gave a nervous laugh. I raised my eyebrows and fingered the dog tags around my neck.

"It's complicated," I replied after a pause, still recovering from the butterflies Brady gave me. I didn't like to talk about Max. There was no need getting into more heartbreak now.

"So…" This time it was Sarah who spoke.

"Curiosity killed the cat," was all I answered, scrunching up my face, "and we are going to be late to class if we don't at least _try _to walk."

It was an obvious turn of the conversation but I really didn't want to get into my faulty taste of guys just yet. Sarah started to say something but I cut her off.

"Let's _go." _

Seeing my expression she nodded. I turned back to Collin and Brady who haven't said anything since Collin first asked that question. Collin was looking at me with open curiosity and confusion, and more than a little worry, while Brady had a unfathomable expression on his face.

"Later."

And with that I spun around and dragged Sarah in the direction of the class room.

A few seconds later I heard footsteps behind me, and I looked over my shoulder, and sure enough both boys were only a step behind us. At seeing Brady behind me a new round of butterflies fluttered in my chest like a merry-go-round all the while me I heart rate speeding up. Almost as if he could tell, Brady's smile turned into a gorgeous smirk.

"How'd you get here so fast?"

Both Collin and Brady looked surprised that I asked that question and Brady's smug smirk disappeared. It wasn't long before Collin started stammering.

"I… uh… we…uh…"

"We were right behind you," Brady lied smoothly.

_BPOV_ **[A/N: I won't be using Brady's POV a lot but I had an idea of what he was thinking and had to right it] **

"You're lying," Nita accused in that unique voice she had, narrowing her deep brown eyes. She reminded me of a polar bear. Warm and loving one minute than hostile and ferocious the next. When she was happy everyone subconsciously moved toward her, but when she was angry, like now, her voice was as cold and hard as the ice the bears live on. When she was sad, like when Collin brought up if she was single, she was alone and fighting for survival on the cold frontier.

_NPOV_ **[A/N: Back to Nita's point of view. I know it was really deep, and probably not what Brady would be thinking, at least not on that level. It was just a thought that I wanted to fit in somewhere. Just saying though, that "Nita" actually means Bear.]**

"Whatever," I muttered, letting it go.

I didn't like people lying to me. It was a pet peeve of mine. I may be a lot of things but loyalty is very important to me. Sighing, and not waiting for him to answer me I finished pulling Sarah into the English classroom and sat down with Sarah just as the bell rang. Trying not to be as aware as I actually was I noticed Collin and Brady sit in the back of the class with an arm around Jennifer Birmingham. Almost, imminently I felt a unreasonable pang in my chest, and tore my eyes away and back to the teacher. Stupid, damn, heart. Sometimes even I don't make sense. My English teacher turned to face us.

"Class," she said, "welcome to junior year."

**Okay, so what did you think? And please feedback on the characters so I can make a few tweaks if I have to! I know, a little slow start but it'll get better.**

**Kayso, I know that Brady's POV was like REALLY deep and he probably wasn't thinking EXACTLY that but I wanted to fit that little description somewhere. Please tell meh, if you want me to switch the POVs other than Nita's and I promise to make it more normal than I did. Not as deep **

**Who's Max? **

**How will Brady's girlfriend affect Nita? **

**What happened between Jennifer and Sarah?**

**Why is Collin acting like a love sick puppy?**

**Why is Brady being so quite? And because I'm nice…. I'll answer that one.**

**A: Brady is being quite, which I assure you is not normal, he **_**is **_**capable of caring out a long conversation, is because he doesn't know what to think about Nita when he already has a GF. No matter how shitting she actually is. **

**OH! I think I just gave away a little! Oh, well. Review and you might get a preview. **

**-Gabby**


	2. Chapter 2

**Kayso, update time again! Sorry I had a lot of A/Ns in my last chapter! Things will start speeding up! I'm warning you, though, normally I won't post two chapter I two days but for some weird reason the stupid computer wouldn't let me post anything so I'm making up for lost time. Read my other story two, it's like the next generation of the Twilight kids. I'm a little stuck with that story so any ideas would help! Also, I have no Beta for either stories and If you are one, or know one, please tell me. Spelling, grammar, and basically any proof reading is not my forte… **

**-G**

By the time it was lunch I could barely keep my head up. So much for that good mood that I woke up with. Luckily all my classes that I had so far were with Sarah. After English, I saw Brady and Collin hustle in the woods and a few minutes later my brother's friend and my ride, Seth, hurry in the same direction. I pointed this out to Sarah and she tried to think about it but soon forgot. I just couldn't shake off the snake that was coiling in my stomach. It wasn't normal behavior, but no one seemed to notice.

"Nita, helloooo. Nita?" Sarah snapped her fingers in front of my face.

"What?" I asked distractedly.

"Are you done?"

I looked down and with a start realized that I've just been standing there, staring into my locker. I quickly grabbed a notebook and swapped it with a different one.

"Done," I chimed and shut the cool, metal door. Sarah grabbed my arm and started leading me toward the direction of the cafeteria. I idly started playing with the dog tags.

The cafeteria was bigger than I originally thought and there were a few tables that didn't have any residents. On one side there was a food counter. Most of the walls had windows. While Sarah continued to pull me to the lunch line so we could get our food, I looked around the cafeteria until I found the familiar face I was looking for.

Keanu was sitting with a group of body-builder natives, which wasn't that big of a surprise. I'm not saying Keanu was buff but he was a jock. He followed in Derek and Dad's footsteps, I just hoped by the end of the year he wouldn't go to Iraq, too. I felt a sharp pang in my chest as I thought of Dad and Derek, and fiddled with my dog tags some more.

I returned my attention the food I was about to get and tried to get a glimpse of my lunch when my jean pocket vibrated. I looked at my Iphone only to see I got a message from Keanu.

**K: What's wrong?**

** Nothing**, I typed back flippantly.

**K: Nita. **

I looked over to the table where Keanu was sitting and locked eyes with him, but not before seeing that Collin and Brady were there to, their heads turned in my direction. I don't think they were looking at me, but I felt my heart rate speed up uncontrollably, and focused on my phone.

**Leave it.**

** K: Something's wrong. U r twirling ur dog tags. **

It was at times like this that I wished my brothers didn't know me so well.

** Later. **

** K: Ne**

I shook a little at hearing my old nick name. Only Derek called me that after dad died.

**Just leave it alright? **

I waited eagerly for his reply but it didn't come. I gazed back to the table he was sitting at but only saw his retreating form, walking out the cafeteria. Now I knew that most eyes were watching me and I scowled at his tactics. This was his punishment.

I was at the front of the line now and Sarah just stopped talking to the person in front of her.

"Do you know what you are gonna get?"

I shook my head and she proceeded to tell me everything there was and which was better before she suddenly stopped.

"What?" I asked, and she giggled.

"Some guys are looking at you."

My heart pounded unevenly and a glanced around the room. My gaze caught no other than Brady's stare and impossibly, my heart rate sped up even more. I quickly tore my eyes away because in those short moments that Keanu left and I got to the front of the line, Jennifer crawled her way and wrapped her light tan arms around Brady.

I kept telling myself it didn't matter. I don't need this right now.

"Is the macaroni good?" I inquired to Sarah, trying to get my mind off of all the things that I didn't want to, and wouldn't, deal with. I was a fighter, it's what I do, and today is no different. Only a little harder.

"It's alright. The oatmeal is what you want to stay away from."

I laughed at her expression.

"What?" she asked, obviously confused by my sudden outburst. I tried to explain but only little fragments of what I was trying to say came out, so I just shook my head.

Sarah pursed her lips deciding whether or not she should be offended. Finally, she settled with an amused expression, letting it go.

The rest of lunch went by quickly. Sarah and I got to know each other better. I learned that her parents were divorced and she to, lived with her mom, and her sibling. Her sibling's name was Shona and she was twelve.

We laughed a lot and I was proud of myself. I didn't look in Brady's direction once. By the time Lunch was over, Sarah and I parted ways and I went straight to my locker. While I was walking I took out my notebook and flipped through it, to see if any notes would help me with my homework tonight. If not, I'll just tuck away in my locker. I was so absorbed into my work I didn't notice anyone walking toward me until my body collided with another one.

Startled, I looked up to find Jennifer, Brady's girlfriend, looked down at me from her 5"8 or 9 height, and my body of barley 5"7, her eyes narrowed in a catlike manner, and her mouth twisted into an ugly frown.

"Watch it," she snapped. It took me a second for what she said register, but when it did I felt it with full force.

"Excuse me?" I stormed.

"You heard me. Now, get. Out. Of. My. Way."

"Make me."

I knew I was playing with fire, but it made something about her ticked me off.

"What did you say?" Jennifer couldn't believe someone was defying her.

"I'm sorry, my fault," I smiled sweetly up at her, "I forgot you were an idiot."

Jennifer was now shaking with fury, and I was pretty close to. But I had more practice. I was very good at control, which means that I absolutely did not start the first punch. All I know is one minute Jennifer and I were having a… friendly… chat, and the next minute were both sitting in the office.

A few minutes later Collin, Brady, Seth, and another guy I didn't know burst through the door, asking—no _demanding—_to the secretary details of what happened. I don't see what the big deal was. Both me and Jennifer where fine. A little sore, but still, fine. Unfortunately for them, the office workers didn't have many answers; we were being quite. I did find out that the strange guy was named Sam, though.

It wasn't until Keanu calmly walked into the office did things start to be set into motion. It only took my brother one look around the now dead silent room, then from Jennifer, and finally resting on me to figure out what happened.

"Nita," he groaned, "Again?"

I grimaced a little bit but knew better to open my mouth. No need to get into anymore trouble. However, the little devil on my shoulder got the best of me.

"This time, it's not _my_ fault."

Jennifer kept quite neither contradicting nor agreeing. Keanu looked so doubtful, it was almost offending. Almost.

"Yes, I have better control than that," I reasoned.

Keanu snorted, and I tried a different tack tick.

"Would I lie to you?" Immediately, I realized my mistake and held up a finger to stop him from replying. "Don't answer that."

Keanu turned grimly to the head of the office.

"What's her punishment?" he asked, and I cringed a little. This was my least faviorte part, and I waited to hear what my sentence would be.

"Well, either the principal or a counsler will answer that. Meanwhile all you need to do is be quite, sit, and be patient."

"Patience is not a virtue. It's a waste of time," I muttered, and Seth laughed before covering his mouth and Keanu gave me a look. I had to bite my lip to keep from grinning like an idiot. I looked over to the natives in one corner of the room taking in the situation. I looked from Collins concerened expression, Seth's amused one. Only Brady and Sam's expressions were unfathomable.

Everything was silent until Brady opened his mouth.

**A/N: Oh cliff hanger! I'm so mean. I would have put more details of the fight but action's not my thing. Well, I'm sick today, yippee. (BOO) So I could post another chapter! (YAY) Click the button. (The review one… just in case you didn't get that.) **

**-G**


	3. Big Girls Dont Cry

**A/N: Ya, I'm still sick so I got a lot of free time! Sorry 'bout any grammar/spelling mistakes… I'm not a very good proof reader…  
>Love, MWA<strong>

Chapter 3

_It's personal, myself and I_

_We got some straightening out to do_

_It's time to be a big girl now_

_And big girls don't cry_

_-Big Girls Don't Cry by Fergie_

NPOV_

_Everything was silent until Brady opened his mouth…_

"Is anyone hurt?" he asked his expression still unreadable.

I looked over at Jennifer. She stared deep into Brady's eyes and shook her head. Jennifer looked over at me, and I found my head moving back and forth on its own accord.

"Anyone gonna tell us what happened?"

Jennifer and I shared a look full of remorse, loathing, and understanding. We weren't going to say anything. When our intentions were clear Brady ran a hand through his short, black hair and gave a frustrated sigh much like the one Keanu gave me. See the pattern?

I felt fury building up at the thought. I was not a _problem. _And if I was, I could take care of myself; I wasn't a chore. It was at times like this were my anger got to the better side of me, and I wished they would just leave. But as soon as they did, my anger would recede and I'd find myself alone, with a big ass mess to clean up. So, I tried to swallow my burning temper down as best I could, when the counselor came I'm.

"Hello, I am Mrs. Davis," she introduced pleasantly. Mrs. Davis was obviously Native American with long, straight black hair pulled into a ponytail the naturally tan skin. She was probably in her mid-thirties, and wore the attire typical for a counselor. Or at least a counselor in my experience. This was a white button down, and some color of khakis. In Mrs. Davis's case, tan ones only a little lighter than her skin.

Mrs. Davis started lecturing about a whole bunch of nonsense, in my opinion but one detail stuck out the most.

"What do you mean, not a 'normal' counselor?" I demanded.

"Well," she answered reluctantly, "I am technically a Psychotic counselor but—"

I didn't even let her finish.

"What?" I shrieked, "Again?"

After dad died, and after some very good convincing from Keanu, my mom sent me to a couple of those. There was no way I was going back to the loony bin.

"Yes," Mrs. Davis stated firmly, "And as punishment I will be seeing you both every Tuesday, starting tomorrow."

This time I wasn't the only one complaining. Jennifer said all sorts of things next and I was quick to join her. After a while we both gave up, and Jennifer hid her head in her hands to keep from screaming while I crossed my arms, pursing my lips and glaring at no one in particular.

Mrs. Davis, seeming smug, brushed invisible dirt off her clean khakis, said goodbye to Keanu and the watching Natives, and left the office in a flourish.

No one said anything for a minute. Everyone was waiting for who would make the next move.

"Well," said Jennifer curtly, "I should go." And she walking stiffly out of the office and toward her waiting car, and a little, very small, part of me was happy that Brady didn't follow. The bigger, larger part was now scared out of her mind because she was left in the room with very pissed, very large, guys.

The silence in the office was deafening, and I inwardly cringed. My fingers moving to my dog tags, in nervous habit. They were all looking at me.

"What?" I squeaked. There was a long pause, and they all started talking at the same time. They were quite enough so they didn't draw that much attention but loud enough to make me flinch and made my ears unable to catch on what they were each saying.

"One at a time."

Immediately they stopped talking. Seth was first and he had the most amused smirk on his face.

"Well," he said, "What did you mean, "again"? Have you gone to Psychotic counselor before?"

I looked at him.

"Next," I said quickly and flippantly, ignoring the question. I could've sworn I saw Seth's smirk get bigger. Sam was next.

"Where did the fight start?"

"The hall."

Sam just looked at me.

"The locker hall," I explained more.

Collin was next.

"Was Sarah nearby?" he asked worriedly, and I shook my head.

"She left a little while before."

"What started it?" Brady asked. Ah, my least favorite question. I was hoping he wouldn't ask it. I decided to only give half of the answer.

"We bumped into each other."

He waited. "And?" he prodded.

I made a face.

"She was a bitch."

Before Brady could reply, Keanu saved me with a groan.

"Ne, will you _ever _learn?"

I flinched.

"You mean this has happened before?" questioned Sam, in all seriousness.

Keanu nodded almost pityingly.

"Ya, mostly after our dad died."

I flinched, again. There was no need to explain this to strangers. Just leave it as I messed up and let's go. No one said anything for a moment. Keanu's phone broke the silence.

"Mom," he said.

"You _called her?" _

Keanu nodded and held out the ringing phone to me. I hesitated but decided to get it over with. I grabbed the phone out of my brother's hand and put it to my arm. No one moved.

"Hello?" I whispered.

"_NITA ANNE KLIMEK! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH F**** TTROUBLE YOU'RE IN?" _she didn't wait for me to reply. "_YOU DON'T KNOW HOW LUCKY YOU ARE THAT I AM NOT DRIVING HOME THIS INSTANT. I'M TAKING AWAY YOUR CAR—" _

"I don't have a car," I pointed out but this only set her off more.

_"YOU ARE A DISGRACE. YOUR FATHER WOULD HATE YOU RIGHT NOW IF HE FOUND OUT WHAT YOU DID. YOU DIDN'T DISEREVE HIM! OR DEREK EITHER. YOU'RE LUCKY I HAVEN'T DISONED YOU YET. YOU SHOULD BE MORE LIKE KEANU OR DEREK. YOU'RE DEAD TO ME FOR ALL I CARE—" _

Finally, I couldn't take her screaming and more and I hung up the phone and handed it back to Keanu who looked dumbfounded either because I actually hung up on her or because of some of the things she said. As a result of maybe both of them Keanu's face paled and awful lot.

"Let's go home," I said grimly my face as impassive as ever. My dark brown eyes normally so full of secrets, shut and locked. Without waiting for Keanu's or Seth's reply, I picked myself up, with whatever dignity I had left and walked in the same stiff posture Jennifer had, out the door.

**A/N: So what ya think? I know a little heavy. Brady and Nita alone time will be a little bit in the next chapter and most definitely the one after that. Kinda stuck though on how Brady should act so any ideas? Review! **


	4. Beautiful

**Hey again! So I'm trying something a little different. Instead of writing in first person, I'm writing in second person. I'm just starting to write and I want to experiment a little! So warn me if its drop dead bad ;) so I won't do it again! Review or somehow tell me which view you like better!**

**Thanks -G**

Chapter 4

_Every day is so wonderful_

_And suddenly, I was debris_

_Now and then I get insecure_

_From all the pain_

_I'm so ashamed_

_-Beautiful by Christina Aguilera_

The sun was soft, gently shooting its ray's though the bedroom window and into the white-washed room. Nita lazily rolled over in her white bed, delighting in the soft feeling of her sheets against her tan skin, and her chocolate hair flowed around her. She had a rare smile on her face and lifted an arm to cover her squinted, deep brown eyes from the invading light.

She lay like that in content, soaking up the sunlight that was so limited in La Push. Nita moved only slightly, to drink in more of the early daylight, when a throbbing ache bolted through her body.

Nita sat up, startled and her perfect aura of tranquility didn't quite shatter, but cracked.

"Ow," she whispered.

Her eyes searched her body for the root of her discomfort. Nita found on her upper arm a purplish bruise the size of an egg and caressed it with careful fingers. Nita pressed down slightly and gasped as a very real pain shot through the rest of her arm. She pressed down a few more times her face scrunched up in pain and concentration. Sighing, Nita dropped her arms to her sides and looked over her shoulder to her clock. It was only seven forty. She normally didn't get up until eight. It looked like she was going to have extra time in the morning today. Nita shrugged to herself and winced as more pain entered her. Giving herself a second, she climbed out of bed. Even that brought discomfort, but from a different place. Nita pulled at the silk cami only to reveal another egg-sized bruise on her ribcage. Just like she did with her arm, Nita inspected her injury and decided this one too, was minor. She dropped the thin, cream material from her fingers and made her way to a different side of the room.

Nita opened her wooden, closet doors as far as they could go. Ever feel like you couldn't find a thing to wear even if you have a million clothes? This was one of those days for Nita, and she admitted to herself, a small part of the dilemma might be caused by the extremely good-looking guy that she was trying to push out of her mind. Not that it worked, Brady never seemed to be far from her thoughts. She kept replaying yesterday in her mind; from catching his alluring eyes before first period, to lunch when her brother walked out, all the way to the fight with Jennifer and the office. Nita couldn't recall Brady saying much during those times, and found she found herself stressing over what he might've been thinking. He just seemed so… so… _impassive _during the whole thing. What if she blew her chances? Nita mentally kicked herself for that one; she never had a chance to begin with. But even as she thought, that her traitorous mind kept rolling back to his warm hazel eyes, strong chin, broad shoulders, and those thick, thick muscles that wrapped around his arms and—

_Stop it Nita, _she angrily scolded herself. Where has any of this come from? She was never like this before. It was so… so… _unnatural. _Nita didn't like it. She didn't like how much she cared, and stressed and certainly didn't like how he made her feel. He called to her. Brady and all his inhuman glory.

Nita's heart skipped a beat.

That's it. It was inhuman. _He_ was inhuman. _Not natural._ It was supernatural. Nita knew something was different with him, and maybe Collin, too. She would figure it out.

She knew it.

**Later_**

Nita stumbled into her English classroom just as the bell rang and took a seat next to her first, and only, friend, Sarah.

"You were almost late," she whispered as their teacher started writing on the board. Nita nodded her head.

"I know," she whispered back. Sarah made a weird, laughing sound.

Nita looked at her curiously.

"What?" she asked, still quiet.

Sarah bit back a smile and twisted one of Nita's silky locks around her index finger.

"Is your hair normally this curly?"

Nita made a face. She had enough time to slide jeans on and a grey short-sleeve shirt on, but was so preoccupied in her thoughts; she only had enough time to twist a red scarf around her neck, and over her dog tags before heading out the door. Not only that, but Max tried to call her again. She didn't need any more stress that morning so she just ignored it.

"Normally? Yeah…" Nita sighed and like Sarah, twisted another lock around her finger. She wasn't too unfortunate. Her hair didn't get frizzy, or really spirally and puffy, it just looked really wild and knotted up.

"Well, I like it."

It was at times like this that Nita knew her friend was loca.

"It makes you look untamed, and raw," Sarah explained, seeing Nita's expression. Nita just looked. _Raw _and_ untamed _wasn't the normal look she tried to achieve. Actually, when she thought about it, there was _any _look she tried to achieve.

Sarah sighed and shook her head, turning her attention back to the front of the class room where Mrs. Jenkins started her lesson. Nita tried to do the same but was mostly found herself turning her head to look at the empty desks behind her. Jennifer, Collin, _and _Brady were all absent. Nita's suspicion, as did her sadness, grew, and continued to, for the rest of the day.

Much to Sarah's delight Collin came around lunch time. All three talked, and Nita didn't forget to notice how yesterday's events never came up. Nita called up Sarah after the incident and spilled her guts out but Sarah liked the idea of someone kicking Jennifer's arse.

Earlier this morning Nita discovered how close the school to her house really was, and walked. So to prove her luck when Nita was more than fifteen minutes away she just had to remember the cold, lonely notebook sitting in her locker, and walked all the way back to the place she was so excited to get away from.

Nita was surprised at how quickly all the students filed out, but the school was small. Either way, Nita's locker was on the wall, in the middle of the empty hall. She hurried to it and quickly flew through the combination. She ready to get the notebook and dash out of the school as quickly as she could when a strong warm hand roughly grasped her arm right where her bruise was and swung Nita to face them.

Nita's heart rate sped up as she looked into Brady's angry hazel eyes. Her almond eyes widened slightly and she clutched her notebook to her trying not to flinch as pain continued to shoot up her arm.

"What?" she breathed and her voice cracked at the end showing only a small piece of the fear she was feeling.

"That fight you two got in? Jennifer has a _bruise. A fucking bruise_." Brady's other fist landed inches from Nita's face. When Nita didn't answer his stone grip tightened, and Nita couldn't stop her face morphing into pain. Nita quickly tried to smooth her expression back over, but not before Brady saw it, and he inwardly cursed. He slowly removed his hand from her arm his eyes locked with the purplish bruise on her upper arm. With tender fingers he brushed against it making a shiver run down Nita's spine. Brady then took in the rest of her appearance settling on an even bigger bruise on her other wrist. This one was starting to yellow.

"Where'd you get that?" he asked, still only inches from Nita's still form.

"Max," Nita blurted out, without thinking. She didn't mean to tell Brady the truth. Actually, she didn't mean to tell anyone. Only Keanu and Derek knew. And it never came up after that night. _Ever. _

"Who the hell is Max?" he grounded out trying to keep calm so he wouldn't scare her.

"No one," Nita said quickly, obviously lying.

"Nita. Who. Is he?"

Nita shook her head. Tears beginning to threaten escape. When Nita still refused to tell Brady anything, he started to shake violently.

"Nita. Go."

Not needed to be told twice she hurried out of the school building and when she got home, locked the door.

Later that night, a wolf gave a broken cry into the night, and Nita felt the exact same way.


	5. ET

**I know I promised some Brady/Nita alone time on this chapter but hold on—I postponed it a little but it's coming up! I'm gonna right in 1****st**** person unless I have another request. I'm also going a **_**little **_**Cinderella-y with the wicked step mother here, just warning you. Oh and thanks so much to my wonderful beta **_**Mythical Worlds. **_

**-G**

Chapter 5

_You're so hypnotizing _

_Could you be the devil? Could you be the angel?_

_Your touch magnetizing _

_Feels like I am floating, leaves my body glowing_

_-E.T by Katy Perry ft. Kanye West_

I awoke the next morning to the sweet, _sweet _smell of chocolate syrup and pancakes. Keanu was probably trying to cheer me up. Last night, when I arrived home, I wasn't in an exactly _sane _state. He didn't push it, though. That was Derek's job; to knock some sense into me. There was no doubt I was going to get a very firm phone call later today.

Keanu was better at subtler—but still effective—ways to make me feel better. Pancakes were one of them. Delectable, delicious pancakes. He was also, in my opinion, the best chef in the world. And I'm not saying that just so I can get free food.

"Nita!" Keanu's voice floated up the stairs, "Breakfast! First come, first serve."

I didn't have to be told twice. I jumped out of bed and raced to the door trying to yank it open. It was locked. As fast as I could and stumbling a bit, I finally got the lock undone.

"Get dressed first!"

I inwardly groaned. He just had to make me wait. Even though no one was around to see my aggravation, I stomped over to my dresser and bitterly jerked the wooden doors open. It was cloudy today, surprise-surprise, so I pulled out jeans and a long sleeve shirt. It was a good thing I thought ahead and packed a million of those.

Once I was done, I ran into the bathroom. My hair was like yesterday but again, I didn't bother with it. I examined myself in the bathroom mirror and my hand moved to the flat empty shell I put my dog tags in.

Empty.

My eyes immediately shot down to the beautiful shell I collected in Cape Cod. I felt right, my dog tags weren't there. I quickly opened all the drawers. C'mon. Where are they? I turned around and heard a clink sound that my dog tags always made when I made sharp movements. My hand whizzed to my neck. Sure enough, my dog tags were there. Relieved, I exhaled the breath I was holding in. I must have fallen asleep with them on.

"Nita!"

"Coming," I yelled back down to Keanu, and rushed out of my room and down the stairs to the waiting pancakes. I skipped my way to our kitchen and stopped.

My mother was sitting on a chair in a big sweatshirt and yoga pants. Her straight hair was in a messy bun. She just looked at me with dead light brown eyes.

I pulled my shock together and slowly straightened my spine. Her mouth that was in a flat line that mirrored my own.

"Nita."

Her voice matched her eyes

"Mother."

Keanu, seeing the tension for once in his life, tried to lighten the mood.

"You already for school, Ne?" he asked in a cheerful voice.

"All ready."

Keanu looked stuck for a second and you could practically see the wheels turning in his head. Finally, a light flashed through his eyes.

"So mom, anything you want to tell Nita?"

"No honey, I'm alright," her croaky voice was laced with innocence, and she batted her eyelashes sweetly up at her son.

I had to restrain myself from rolling my eyes. Last night's meal was threatening to come out of my mouth.

"Okay," noted Keanu. He gave a small nod to himself and went back to cleaning and sorting the kitchen. Meanwhile, I hadn't moved from my spot, and sure enough my mom's mouth opened once more.

"Actually, Nita, can you please go in the attic and move the boxes into your room?"

"Uh… What?" I stammered, stunned, "Why?"

"The attic is getting a little cramped. Your room is much bigger. When you get home from school you can finish up."

I just stared at Ana Klimek, the women I called my mother. The request was so _stupid_, so _idiotic_. And it was my room. I finally got used to it and now I have to move? My mom can be so… frustrating…. It was like she is deliberately trying to kill my spirits, or at least what was left of it.

"Mom, I don't—" Keanu tried but Ana put up a hand to silence him.

"No," she assured charmingly, "It has to be done." She was so sweet it was actually sickening. "Oh, and Nita, have you heard from that boy… what's his name…," Mom pondered for a second,

"Max?"

Rage I have never felt before flared through me and I clenched my fists and unclenched them over and over. She knew very well what happened, and she dare bring it up again? Everyone knew how much it hurt me and yet she brings it up again. I never wanted to leave him but _she_ made me. Over one little bruise. She never gave a crap before, but this one—one I liked—she did.

Outraged tears were threatening to escape but I wouldn't let her have the satisfaction of seeing me cry. At that moment I really wanted Keanu to dive into the conversation and save me but he wasn't Derek. I was all alone in this battle.

"No, mom," I groaned out, and I saw anger flash through her cold, light brown eyes. She had no right to be angry at me, I didn't do anything wrong, "And I cannot clean the attic yet. I have to go to school."

Ana opened her mouth but I cut her off.

_"Now." _

I gave Keanu a look that spoke volumes and grabbed my bag before storming out the door, and slamming it shut behind me.

I sat on a curb waiting for Seth to pick us up again and was hyper aware, but trying not to act like it, of the door opening and closing. Without turning around I knew Keanu was walking toward me, calm and collected like always.

"Ne," he sighed and sat next to me. I refused to look at him, nor did I feel him looking at me. We were both just sitting, watching the still forest across from us.

"Why does she hate me so much?" My voice cracked at the end, giving away a little of the emotion I tried so hard to cover up, and rang out loud and clear through the misty morning.  
>Beside me, Keanu sighed but didn't answer. Before I could question his further, a familiar Toyota turned up into our street.<p>

Seth honked the horn, and Keanu climbed into the front. I opened the back door no emotion on my face, only to find a girl I didn't know sit on the car seat where I sat yesterday. Her expression wasn't much different than mine. We locked eyes. They were almost the exact shade as mine. Even my family didn't have my eyes. From somewhere in the car I heard Seth say, "This is Leah, don't mind her."

I nodded but didn't acknowledge him. Instead, I just climbed into the car. Neither of us said anything. We didn't need to. Her eyes were full of emotion. There was curiosity, shock, a little contempt, amusement and… tenderness. Finally, I had to look away. She was creeping me out. Then her deep brown eyes moved to Keanu. He turned to look at her and was about to introduce himself when their eyes locked. They stared at each other but not in the same way Leah and I overlooked each other seconds before.

I swear Keanu was actually gawking. And lost for words. Something I've never seen before.

"Hi," he said shyly. Keanu was never shy. At least before. I had a feeling lots of things are going to change.

"Hi." Leah narrowed her eyes at him and turned to look out the window. A look of hurt flashed across his face. A little joy bubbled up inside me and the devil in me danced. Finally, he feels some pain to. Though as soon as I thought it I pushed it down. This was Keanu I was talking about, not mom.

"How old are you?" I asked Leah abruptly.

"It's rude to ask a person's age," she shot back her eyes alight with challenge.

"I never said I was nice, did I?"

Leah looked a little proud but smoothed her face back over.

"How old do you think I am?"

"I wouldn't be asking if I knew," I retorted.

We stared each other down.

"I think I like you," she concluded.

"I wish I could say the same."

To my surprise she laughed.

"Whoa, is Leah actually laughing?" Seth looked into the car mirror. "Yep, she is."

"Shut up."

Leah obviously didn't like this new found information and scowled at me.

I glared right back.

__School_

I was lucky enough to not have run into Brady, yet. I know he was looking for me though. People told me that he asked them to ask me to find him, but I was not in the mood to hear what he had to say, or what excuse he would use to rationalized his behavior.

This whole thing was so confusing. _He _was so confusing. Every time I replayed what happened in my mind our run-in changed a little. None of it made any sense.

How could a guy I barely new, hold so much power over me? And he was taken.

*****_**Flashback**_

_I hurried through the halls to get to class. _

_ "Stop Brady, that tickles." _

_ I stopped in my tracks. I knew that voice. I didn't know what made me do it but as if some force was pulling me I turned and peered around a wall corner. _

_ Jennifer's slim, long arms were wrapped around Brady and she was leaning into his strong chest. He was whispering something in her ear. At least I _hope _it was whispering. My world felt like it was getting ripped open and torn apart from the roots. It was like someone stabbed me in the back without me knowing. _

_ Jennifer giggled again and I tore my eyes sharply away, using the wall for support. After a few more giggles I was done. It felt like my heart was breaking into a million pieces, shattering on the floor like glass. So I did the one thing never thought I would do; I fled. Not to my classroom. Outside—I needed to breathe. I didn't come back for first period or second. Not even third. _

_ I did come back at lunch, though. I was not raised as a coward. _

_*****__**End Flashback**_

I didn't care.

I shouldn't care.

I closed my locker with a bang. I wasn't the type of person to vent out my emotions but if I didn't soon I would explode. Only one more period to go and then I would be out if this self-inflicted jail. I turned violently away from my locker but not before I saw the one thing that caused most of my paranoia.

As soon as I was him I tried to turn the opposite direction. Too late, his eyes caught mine, and he started following me. I walked faster.

"Nita."

Brady's arm caught mine. I winced a little; he was stronger than you'd think. Slowly I turned to face him. Before I could utter a word Brady spoke urgently.

"Let me explain."

I looked into his hazel eyes. They were beautiful, no use denying that, but they were close. To close.

"No." Yes. "Whatever is up with you, I… don't want to know." Lie. "I just… can't deal with it right now."

And just like that all the things I wanted to say were tied into the back of my throat. This would be the one time I could tell him what a bastard he was and how he made me feel. It may be the only time, but I couldn't do it. Both fear and desire were dangerous things and when you're working with both, side by side, the threat is doubled.

Looking straight into his eyes, I kept my face an impassive mask, my smooth features contradicting the emotions swirling inside of me. I wanted to yell at him. I wanted to strangle him. I wanted to kiss him. But sometimes it doesn't matter what you want. I had to figure things out myself without Brady distracting me. I had to figure out if I should—and could— trust him. So I roughly tore my arm out of his grasp and stalked off leaving him, and my hope, behind in the hallway.

**Kayso, like it? Hate it? I don't care… actually I do… no…yes…anyway just REVIEW! I know Ana Klimek's (aka the wicked stepmother) request for her to move into the attic is a **_**little **_**odd but it'll make sense very soon. Like in the next two chapters soon.**


	6. Rolling in the Deep

_There's a fire starting in my heart, _

_Reaching a fever pitch and it's bring me out the dark_,

-_Rolling in the deep by Adele_

Chapter 6

I didn't go straight to my classroom. Instead, I ran to the nearest escape; the bathroom. I wasn't easily scared and intimidated but sometimes hiding is acceptable.

I don't know how long I was waiting in the sterile, white room. Minutes, hours, seconds. It wasn't until the final bell rang that I left my bleak safe haven. I didn't see Brady on my way out but I did see Sarah getting it on with Collin. I didn't bother to disrupt them so I walked out of the school alone and unnoticed. Instead of heading home I decided to check out the small town. There had to be a bookstore or a coffee shop or _something._ I didn't think we were that stranded.

Sure enough, there was a coffee shop. I walked into _Jitters Coffee_, and the chimes rang as I stepped in. It was a lot more crowded than I expected but not too bad. I stood in line looking at the assorted pastries while I waited.

"Miss?" the cashier asked. His voice was scratchy like a lion but still somehow managed to be smooth. It reminded me a little of Brady's voice except Brady's voice was more velvety. I angrily pushed him out of my mind and looked up to order my drink.

Not a good idea.

This guy was hot. As in, well, _really_ hot. He had dark copper skin, wavy brown hair, and his hypnotic hazel eyes were looking at me.

"Oh…" I stumbled and the cashier-guy smiled. I quickly composed myself, "I'll have a caramel latte with extra whip." There was a pause. "Please," I added.

"Alright, I'm Lucas by the way. Lucas Fuller."

I smiled at him.

"Nita Klimek."

He looked momentarily dazed before regaining composure. He couldn't be that much older than me. Eighteen, maybe. Or nineteen- I could see that too. Lucas turned around to make my latte. His jeans hung on his waist and hugged his bottom perfectly….

I blushed and looked for something beside me to distract myself. I didn't normally think this way. Who knows why I'm starting now.

"Here you go," Lucas winked while I took the cup from his hand. I blinked finding my head a little cloudy a brushed my hand against his. Lucas's skin was hot to the touch, much like Brady's.

At the thought of Brady's name I found by head clearing up a bit. But not before I could blurt out, "Do you have a fever?"

I would've apologized for being nosey but I was too curious.

"No," he chuckled and I narrowed my eyes. "You should stay here while you drink. It's cold outside," he suggested.

"I can't, sorry."

I took the cup out of his hand and turned on my heel, starting toward the door.

"Thank you!" I called back from over my shoulder and continued my trek. After a few more steps the outside air rushed straight through me. I shivered. Damn it was cold, Lucas was right. It was a times like this when I wished I brought a better jacket. I tugged at my sweatshirt and pulled it a little tighter against me. I could see my house now. It wasn't that far away. I picked up the pace a little to a small jog and as soon as I got closer to a full out sprint. I yanked the door open and closed it behind me quickly and out of breath.

I started walking to my room when I heard a voice clear. I spun around to face my mother.

"Yes?" I asked distractedly I wanted to get into my room and warm up. That's when it hit me. The attic was my room now. And it was cold. Ana smiled at me pleased to see the wheels turning in my head once again and left me standing. She didn't need to even say anything and she made me feel horrible. Sighing I looked down at the cup of coffee in my hand. The outside air made it chilly. So much for that. I should've listened to Lucas and finished it in the coffee shop. Well, too late. I tossed the cold cup in the trash can while I walked up the first flight of stairs and reached for the string on the roof. Our attic had one of those pull out stairs to get up there.

The attic was small. It was a miracle that all the boxes fit. The good news is it did have a small window and it already had a mattress. I walked over to it. It was folded once and leaning against the wall. It looked as big as my mattress in the other room except this one didn't have a bed frame and looked like it would take up all the whole room once it was unfolded. Sighing, I turned away from my new 'bed' and looked at the damage I had to clean up. There were clusters of nick-knacks and books everywhere. It would take forever to clean up. I decided I should start with the boxes. I picked up the biggest one. It wasn't very heavy. I took it to my room and placed it taking my wolf figurine back up the attic with me. I placed it on the window frame. I did the same thing for three more boxes.

There were only three more boxes left. I picked up the fourth box and nearly doubled over. It was heavy. I stood there for a second contemplating what I should do. I'm sure Ana wouldn't mind if I took a few things out to make the load easier.

I opened the card board box. It was filled with papers and pictures. I picked one of the pictures up. There was a woman in the picture and a small infant in her arms. It was taken in a hospital. Both were undoubtedly Native American. I turned the picture over and picked up another one. This one was when the child was a little older but only by a few months. The same strong woman, with dark brown hair, was in the picture. The little baby's hair was starting to show. They were in a field full of small purple bell-like flowers. My mind was nagging at something but I couldn't place a thought or emotion on it except for a sickening sense of déjà vu. It was the third picture that it finally hit me.

In the third picture the women was sitting on a porch swing with the little baby in hand. My dad was next to her. Oh, god. This cannot be happening. I tossed the picture to the side and shifted frantically through the box some more. Tears were starting to stream down my face. I was looking for something, _anything, _to assure me that I was wrong.

"Nita…"

I whipped my teary-eyed face to Keanu's head poking out of the door.

"Who is she?" I demanded, he didn't say anything. Just kept his eyes on my face with a pitiful expression.

"Who is she?" I demanded again with less force than before and new tears. Keanu didn't move. My tears were flowing freely right now and for once I didn't try to stop the river in the making.

"Did you know?" I whispered hoarsely casting my eyes down.

"Nita—"

I didn't want to hear his excuses.

"Did you know?" My voice was like ice and my eyes snapped to Keanu's face that was now twisted in contempt.

"You knew."

It wasn't a question or so much as accusation. It was a more like a fact. Keanu didn't deny it.

"Did Derek know?"

I already knew the answer. More glistening tears slid down my face. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. And seeing. It felt like my whole life was being torn from the roots. Everything I thought I knew was a lie. I thought I was so close to my family, and I was so sarcastic and snappy thinking I knew everything when I didn't. Now, I wasn't just angry, and sad, and upset. I was embarrassed. No, _humiliated._ These people were my family. Family doesn't keep these types of things in the dark. I wondered if they were ever going to tell me. Probably not.

I angrily brushed past Keanu and jumped down from the attic. Keanu caught my arm but with force I didn't know I had I yanked out of it.

"Don't touch me," I ground out through gritted teeth.

I stormed down the stairs where Ana was waiting with a knowing smile on her face. She was sickening. There was nothing I wanted more in the world at that moment, then to rip her smug little head off her petite little body. I can't believe I ever thought this women was my mother.

"Aren't you going to say anything?" Ana asked clearly annoyed.

"You were supposed to be my mother," I whispered one tear after another falling of my cheeks. My vision was so blurry I could hardly see her.

Ana laughed shrill and cruel.

"Don't you get it, hon? I'm not your mother," Ana's voice turned venomous, "Your mother was a twisted slut that stole my husband away from me. And you," she pointed a finger at me, "Are just like her."

My mind briefly flashed to Brady and Jennifer and even more tears rolled down my face. I shook my head stubbornly. No. No. No.

"Yes," Ana answered my unsaid thought. A sob unlike me escaped my lips. Ana almost looked like she pitied me.

"It's better that you know."

"You…you…" I racked my brain, "you… _bitch."_

"Excuse me?"

I nodded my head and took a step toward her.

"Yes. Yes. _You."_

I lunged for her but she grabbed my wrists and dug her long nails into my skin, causing me to bleed.

"You're in my house honey," Ana hissed, "You follow my rules."

She let go of one hand and slapped me across the face before letting go. My hand flew to my swollen cheek.

I couldn't stand her anymore. I couldn't stand this house, or Keanu or anything. My heart felt like it was being stabbed over and over before being ripped apart into tiny pieces. Then burned.

My tears continued to fall and I rushed passed Ana and out the door slamming it shut behind me.

It was cold.

So cold it almost hurt but not as much as my heart did. The wind picked up and I hugged my arms closer. I had no clue where I was going. My tears stopped. I didn't think I had anymore in my system. I cried more tonight than I had in years combined. My wrists hurt like hell but the pain was distracted by the throbbing ache in my cheek. I was a mess. Bright lights clouded my vision and a truck with darkened windows pulled beside me. Great. Not only was I abused I was going to get raped to. My legs were paralyzed in place either from the biting cold or out of terror. I was not defenseless girl but after tonight all my guards and walls were down.

They window rolled down and I braced myself but after a jolt of panic I was immediately comforted and more than a little surprised.

"Are you alright?" asked Lucas.

I nodded. That was stupid it was too dark for him to see me.

"Yes," I replied but my voice cracked. He seemed to think a moment and then looked me in the eye.

"Get in."

I offered a small smile.

"I don't accept rides from strangers." My voice was small and weak, something that almost never happened.

Lucas smiled reassuringly.

"I'm not a stranger we met today. Remember?"

It sounded like he was talking to a little kid but in my state it was the only thing that registered. The breeze picked up again.

"Get in."

"Alright." Even I didn't want to argue. It was just too cold. I got in and wondered what he was seeing. My hair was a curly mess and my eyes were no doubt bloodshot and I was in freezing cold weather with only a thin jacket to cover me.

"You can't go home." It wasn't a question but I nodded anyway. Lucas thought for a moment.

"You want to stay at my house?"

"I can't do that—" I started to protest but he held up a hand with a faint smile across his lips.

"Yes, you can."

I shook my head and sighed trying to think how to explain without saying stuff I wasn't ready to admit out loud.

"My situation is a bit more…" I searched my mind for the right word, "…permanent."

"That's alright. Stay as long as you want."

I looked at Lucas searching his face for any kind of joke. There was none. I turned back to look out the window. Was this guy for real?

We didn't say anything for a moment.

"You want to talk about it?" Lucas asked with a quick look at me.

I let out a long breath and closed my eyes. My head fit onto the crook of my arm.

"No, I really don't."

I didn't have to look at Lucas to see the wheels turning in his handsome head. The car jolted to a stop and my eyes flew open.

"Were here."

I picked my head up and look at the house. It was a light lemony yellow with a white roof and accents.

"You coming?" Lucas asked from the house. I opened the passenger seat and got out. Stuffing my hands in my pockets.

I met Lucas at the front door. He was fiddling around with some keys before finding the one he wanted and putting it in the lock. Lucas twisted it and there was a soft click before the door swung open revealing one main room which must be the living room. There were closed doors on either sides and on the left wall some stairs. There was a couch in the middle of the room it was facing a flat screen with movies and games on the sides. I turned slowly around the room to get a 360 view. Finally, I turned back to Lucas looking at me with an amused expression and smile.

"Thank you," I gushed. I mean, he barely knew me and yet he invited me into his home. It was actually really sweet.

Lucas's smile grew.

"You're welcome."

I turned my head around when I heard the stairs creak and my heart stopped.

There was Brady. Shirtless. His expression was utter confusion and concern. He made me want to do two things: To reach out and smooth the adorable wrinkles on his face or to run screaming toward the hills. Unfortunately, neither was an option.

"Hi," I tried timidly. I haven't spoken to him sense were in the hallway.

"Are you alright?"

"She's fine," cut in Lucas harsher than I expected, "Or at least, now she is. She's going to stay here for a while."

Brady and Lucas fixed each other in a hard look and I could feel the tension in the room. I looked back and forth between the, I guess, brothers. Finally, I cleared my throat and their attention turned to me.

"Um, is there a place I can sleep or…." I trailed off uncertainly. Other than being invited I wasn't a hundred percent sure what was happening.

"You can take my bed, I'll take the couch," offered Lucas.

"She can take mine. _I'll _take the couch," interfered Brady. Well, I wasn't suspecting this.

"Look I can't just take the couch…" I gestured toward the brown lump next to me.

"You shouldn't have to," argued Lucas and Brady nodded in agreement.

"No really its fine," I gave a short hollow laugh, "my mother was going to make me sleep in the attic tonight anyway."

I just realized I called Ana my mother and I felt my face twist up in upset. My frown once again in place.

"Nita—" Brady began and Lucas gently grabbed my arm. Brady growled. I looked at him curiously but his hazel eyes were glued to Lucas's hand on my upper arm. I took this as a good time to try again.

"I'll take the couch."

My voice was final and they both gave in. Staying here was either going to be the best thing that ever happened to me, or the worst. Or both.

**A/N: The plot thickens and yes, theres a lot more... lol **

**REVIEWS! You know i love em' **


	7. Dead and Gone Part I

**A/N: Okay so just saying that any sentences like **_**this **_**mean its most likely one of Nita's thoughts. And THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to my AMAZING reviewers! (PS. I'll right more the bottom.)Kay, so there are three parts to this chapter just cuz it would be so long if i didnt split it up.  
><strong>

Chapter 7

_Oh hey, Ive been travelin' on this road to long_

_Just tryin' to find my way back home_

_But the old me's dead and gone,_

_ dead and gone, dead and gone_

_-Dead and Gone by T.I  
><em>

I woke up to the smell of sweet, _sweet _pancakes. Slowly I sat up and felt a small uncomfortable ache somewhere in my back. Turns out, when a couch looks lumpy it normally is.

I stood up and stretched not that it did much good. I was probably a mess.

For once, I didn't go straight to the pancakes in the kitchen. Instead, I headed toward the bathroom and closed the door, satisfied when I heard the lock make a soft click. Using the door to support me I let out a long breath I didn't know I was holding. It's not easy staying in a house full of steroid-inflicted male models. Okay so there were only two, but it felt like the house was suffocated with them. It seemed like they were everywhere.

I lingered by the closed door for a moment before hesitantly making my way to the mirror above the sink.

When I thought I was a mess, I wasn't prepared for this. My chocolate brown hair was dull and my spirally curls hung limp. Narcissism was never my thing and I never used a lot of makeup but my eyes needed serious work and my cheek was red and puffy from last night. With light fingers I traced aimless patterns on my cheek. I was going to need cover-up, and a lot of it.

I opened the sink's cabinet drawer and shifted through it but alas, no makeup what so ever. Sighing, I ducked my face in my hands. I really didn't want to go to school today. Keanu was going to be there and I didn't want to deal with that. My own brother just let me walk out of the house. If Keanu was even my brother. Not to mention there was a Spanish test today and an in class Social Studies essay. I didn't even want to think about Math.

A new problem hit me. I didn't even have clothes. Or money. And I was not going home if it was the last thing I do. Who can survive without clothing or money? _Not me, that's for sure_, nagged a very mean thought. I sighed again and picked my head up.

_Step by step Nita_. Derek's advice rang in my head. I quickly pushed him out of my mind. He was right, but I still didn't want to think about it.

I glanced at the door. I'd have to come out sometime.

_Don't be a coward. _

Uncertainly I crossed the small space and reluctantly opened the door. Wavering a little bit, I silently walked into the kitchen where Brady was still flipping pancakes. He didn't notice me yet but at least that gave me the small advantage to mutedly climb up on the kitchen stool and watch him.

"Your phone's been ringing," Brady said deeply without looking up from cooking. I was surprised, I didn't think he noticed me scamper in. On cue, the shrill sound of a phone call filled the tight kitchen.

Without a word a stretched across the table and snatched my cell into my hand. I took a quick peek at the caller I.D.

Derek.

I stared at my phone but just let it ring.

"Aren't you going to answer it?" Brady asked finally turning around with a plate of pancakes. I didn't look up.

"Nope."

I popped the "p" at the end. The ringing finished but I didn't stop staring at the device in my hand. Derek was persistent. Sure enough, the annoying ringtone filled the air once more. I moved my thump and clicked the end button placing it back on the table. Wordlessly, Brady laid a plate in front of me before sitting across the island.

We sat in silence eating. After a few moments I broke through the awkward, quite air.

"You know, pancakes are my favorite." It was random but the tense atmosphere was getting to me. "I liked chocolate chip. My brothers used to make it for me when I was upset." I stared out the window, aware that Brady was looking at me, always watching.

"Do you have a pet?" I asked abruptly turning toward him. Brady smirked like he knew something I didn't.

"No, do you?"

I shook my head.

"No, but I always wanted a dog. "

Brady's smile grew more amused and his hazel eyes were crinkled at the end with unspoken laughter. I decided to ignore it.

"We used to have wolves near where I lived," I informed him, "I always wanted one as my pet," Brady's smile stayed in place, "When I was younger my… dad—" I struggled with the word "—gave me a glass figure of one. It's in the attic," I added and paused waiting to see if Brady was going to say anything. He didn't so I continued my monologue, "He died in Iraq. That's why I wear his dog tags," I gestured to my neck, "My brother is there now. Derek… you don't know him, he's there right now."

I let Brady process this information. I haven't told any of my friends in La Push this yet, not even Sarah. It just never came up. There was no real reason I was telling Brady this. I guess after a night like last night I just needed to get it out.

"When you found out your dad died what happened?"

I wasn't expecting for Brady to ask this question. I wasn't really expecting him to ask any. And out of all the things I just said he picked this to ask me. It surprised me most because no one else ever did.

I looked down at my pancakes before meeting Brady's eyes. For once, I would not shy away.

"Well," I started slowly, "I got a tattoo."

I wasn't supposed to say that but I wanted to see his reaction. Brady looked momentarily shocked.

"It's a barcode," I continued cautiously, "The numbers are the date he died."

My hand moved to the back of my neck and I rubbed the tattoo self-consciously. Not even Derek knew. It was supposed to be a secret. So much for that.

Brady still looked dumfounded.

"It was my way of rebelling," I paused, "My last fighting effort."

There was a silence again. Brady still hasn't said anything. What if he thought I was a slut or something? I mean it was a tattoo. I shouldn't have said anything.

"You do that when you're nervous."

"What?" I stared at Brady unsure if I heard right.

"You do that when you're nervous," he repeated and motioned to my hands toying the metal tags. I was stunned. Only Keanu figured that out.

"Uh-h. Y-ya," I stammered. We sat in dead air. I went back to stuffing my mouth so I didn't have to speak.

"We should go to school," Brady reminded me, "I'll drive. We have to pick up Jennifer, too."

That one was like a blow to the gut. _Stop being so jealous, _I chided myself_, he's not yours. _

"Right. Where's Lucas?"

Brady visibly tensed. Ha. How good does it feel now? _Totally not jealous. _

"Work. Why?"

I shrugged trying to hide a smile at his discomfort.

"Just wondering."

I looked away.

"I'm not going to school," I resolved after a moment.

"What? How come?"

I didn't want to tell him the real reason; Keanu was there. And everything else I didn't want to admit yet. Like being in the same car as Brady and Jennifer. _Not jealous,_ I reminded myself.

"I… need to do a few... things… in Seattle."

Well it was partly true. I needed to get more information on my biological family. It will be hard but I'm determined to find out what my _family _never told me. But not in Seattle.

"You can't drive."

Shit. Think…

"I'll… walk."

Brady looked at me.

"It's Seattle."

I sighed.

"Please?" I asked him batting doe eyes. Brady stilled.

"Fine—"

I smiled triumph fitly.

"—but I'm going with you."


	8. Dead and Gone Part II

**A/N: Part Two! I think I'm gonna make a part three…. I don't know yet. More at the bottom…..**

**Disclaimer: I am not Stephanie Meyer (I know, hard to tell right?)**

* * *

><p>Chapter 8<p>

_Oh hey, Ive been travelin' on this road to long_

_Just tryin' to fin my way back home_

_But the old me's dead and gone_

_dead and gone_

_-Dead and Gone by T.I  
><em>

I was mad. For one, I didn't get shot gun. Two, when Brady said he was coming with me he didn't mention a certain someone was going to tag along, too.

"Are we there yet?" whined Jennifer.

I swear if I heard that one more time I was going to rip out my hair and scream bloody murder. Instead I pushed down my aggravation and looked out the window. Not much to see except blobs of green and brown.

"About fifteen more minutes, princess," revealed Brady turning to look at his girlfriend who sighed before gazing back onto the empty road.

_Focus on trees, _I urged myself,_ c'mon_ focus.

"Why do you need to go to Seattle again?" I asked Jennifer, turning my attention to the un-wanted guest in hopes that Brady and Jennifer would stop cooing at each other like lovesick animals.

"I need a new dress," she replied breezily. Jennifer flipped her hair and turned to look out the window.

"Of course you do," I muttered to myself and looked down at my worn out converse.

Minutes went by in tortured silence.

"Will you stop doing that!" snapped Jennifer. Immediately my fingers stopped twisting my dog tags but I didn't look up from my shoes. I reached behind me and rubbed my tattoo. I realized that today just got a lot longer.

Without warning Jennifer screamed high and piercing and the car lurched to a stop. My head snapped up.

"On my god. Ther-r-re…" Jennifer screamed again.

I followed her frightened gaze to a ruined silver car on the other side of the road. There was blood and metal scattered everywhere.

Before my thoughts fully registered I was up and out of the car. I was deaf to Brady running after me and yelling my name.

Everything felt like it was being in slow motion. Stretched and pulled so it reached eternity.

All that really matter at that moment was getting to the car.

I slowed to a halt.

I pulled the broken door off a pile of rubble to see a woman around forty with short brown hair and russet skin staring straight through me. All color was drained from the woman's body and I reached down to put to fingers on her neck.

No pulse.

Dead.

I closed her eyes with the palm of my hand and pulled her limp body out of the debris. The women should've weighed at least ninety pounds. But pulling her was too easy, like all her insides were drawn out of her body.

No thoughts were running through my mind, no emotions were swirling in my stomach, and no cry escaped my lips. I was numbed to the core, and was working on out pilot.

I stepped over the broken body and continued to shift through the wreckage.

Police sirens only made most the way into my brain. To me it was subtle background music to the nightmare I was still oblivious to in front of me eyes.

When I moved a larger pile of car remains and pale blue hand appeared. I dug through the metal litter, determined to see the face that went with the hand. I removed a larger piece as strong arms grabbed me and started dragging me from the crimes scene.

"No!" I screamed and struggled as more arms surrounded me and tried to drag me back away from my best friend.

"Sarah," I sobbed and continued resisting being pulled away.

Without warning one piece of my brain clicked and impulse took over. I kicked and punched my way out the cage of arms and started running over back to my friend.

Another hand caught my arm and I yanked out of their grasp. Maneuvering quickly so no one could catch me I darted back over to my friend and sank to my knees beside her. I had to know.

Once again I reached two fingers out a gently pushed them onto her blue neck.

Nothing.

My hand dropped to my side. I didn't have to wipe my eyes No tears were left.

I didn't resist as someone pulled me onto my feet and dragged me away from the ruble and toward the bright blur of lights of police cars.

I was unaware when the person pushed me into a car.

"Take her to Emily's."

"I will."

That was Brady's voice but I didn't do anything to show I recognized it.

The car went once again speeding down the road. Jennifer was in the passenger seat rocking back in forth with her hands over her face, wailing. Brady was cooing gently at her saying everything was going to be alright.

I didn't say anything, just sat motionless from where I was put down a second ago.  
>The car made its way to a slow stop.<p>

Brady got out and swiftly walked around the car to gather a crying Jennifer in his arms. He then opened my door. I looked at him with dead hallow eyes. At that time he was a stranger to me. Shifting Jennifer so he had a hand free, Brady reached for my shoulder to comfort me. As soon as he touched my shoulder I snarled, animalistic like an angry wolf.

Brady's eyes widened in surprise and Jennifer cried louder.

"Shh, princess, it's alright," he told her but his eyes never left mine.

I growled low again.

A warning.

All that was left of me was replaced by something without a conscience something without reason. I did this when I was really upset. I lost myself.

Meanwhile, Jennifer's wails only grew.

Arguing with some inner conflict Brady finally closed the door and moved away to bring Jennifer inside.

I sat in the car for a long time. I didn't recognize time in the state I was in. I sat there not thinking about anything, looking at the seat fabric in front of me.

Slowly memories of this afternoon seeped and crawled its way into my mind. I was coming back to myself and with it, my emotions. Sarah's face swirled into view and a strangled cry erupted from my throat, but still no tears. My gut twisted into knots and my heart was stabbed.

I was truly alone now. I didn't have a mom. My dad was dead. My brothers weren't really mine. And the one thing that I had left was my best friend and now that too, was ripped away from me.

I was angry, and sad, and upset. But more than anything I was alone. I didn't have anyone anymore. No rock to lean on.

No one to save me.

Everyone was dead and gone.

And I was tired.

So, so tired.

I slumped in my seat. It felt like my life, my will, was sucked out of my body.

But because I was raised as a fighter, I picked myself up and opened the car door.

A log house was in front of me, smack in the middle of the woods. Gradually I made my way to the door and twisted it open.

Everyone went silent.

I didn't recognize anyone except for Sam and Seth. I felt like all eyes were on me. I met their eye unflinchingly, and unemotionally.

"Hi," said one of the only females. A guy that looked a lot like Brady put an arm protectively around the girls shoulders, "I'm Kim. This is Jared." Kim gestured to the guy.

I didn't say anything. I didn't trust my voice.

"I'm Emily."

The woman was beautiful even though she had scars down one side of her face. She made me feel a tiny bit comforted to know that someone else was broken to.

A cry pierced through the silence. Jennifer. I faintly heard Brady tried to shush her.

The door behind me opened and slammed and a very mad looking Lucas stormed in and straight to the room where Brady and Jennifer were residing. I heard a door slam and yelling even though I couldn't make out the words. A couple people flinched but I stayed still unmoving.

Leah was next to come in.

"Nita," she breathed in relief.

To my surprise Keanu followed her. I wasn't expecting to see him. Ever. He ran up and hugged me. I didn't return it.

"I'm so glad you're alright," he mumbled into my hair before letting go and stepping back to sit on the couch.

"You wanna go back hope, Ne? Today was probably hard on you."

I just looked at him, stood up without saying a word and went outside and slammed the door behind me. I wasn't ever going back.

I picked up my pace and ran into the woods. I wondered aimlessly and didn't stop when it got dark. I continued my way to nowhere. Climbing up rocks, jumping over logs and through ferns.

A cliff face came into view and I went in that direction. I stood on the edge and looked out on the ocean letting the cool air rush through me. I closed my eyes and let my pain in gulf me. I sank to my bottom and let my legs hang over the cliff face and leaned back so I was resting on the ground.

My eyes were still closed and I didn't block up my pain. Instead, I waited until my mind couldn't bear it anymore and let the hurt lull me to sleep.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So? Love it? Hate it? This story won't be **_**two **_**gory but it does have a few scenes. I also need a new character to be Nita's best friend. Should it be:**

**Mira – the shy book girl Sarah pointed out**

**Liz Malik – Jennifer's follower ***_**cough**_*** I mean friend. **

**An entirely new character. **

**A mix of the above**

**If you picked C, name description, anything you can send me would be great! **

**And just so if your wonderin, Collin did NOT IMPRINT ON SARAH! But if you send me your charachter info there might be a lil something :)  
><strong>

_**REVIEW! **_


	9. Lose Youself 1

**A/N: Sorry it's been SO long! I've had so much to do and it was testing… and I'm not gonna give any more excuses. Okay, so I have two of Nita's new friends, Mira and Danie. **** I still need one more though! So REVIEW! Read at the bottom, too!  
><strong>

Chapter 9

_The clock's run out, time's up over, bloah!_  
><em> Snap back to reality, Oh there goes gravity<em>  
><em> Oh, there goes Rabbit, he choked<em>  
><em> He's so mad, but he won't give up that<em>  
><em> Easy, no<em>

-_Lose Yourself _

* * *

><p>I woke up, not on the cliff face, or on the forest floor, but on a couch in a warm room.<p>

The dream last night seemed so real... It was just a dream, right?

I answered that one myself- of course it was.

And for one tiny moment everything was alright. I would call Sarah today and see if she wanted to go to a movie, and we would laugh and have fun. I would tell her about my mom, and Ana, and Keanu, and she would nod and comfort me at all the right times and make up ridiculous evil plans for revenge.

Then I remembered it wasn't a dream.

The huge boulder of relief that was lifted off my shoulders came crashing back down again, but it didn't crush me. No, that would've been too merciful.

I let out a long sigh and sat up. I really needed to pee. My legs, knowing what I needed, picked me up and on their own accord walked down a hall. There were plenty of doors but I didn't think anyone of them were bathrooms.

Unexpectedly, one of them swung opened. I turned my torso around and Brady was rubbing his head tiredly. He looked up and saw me and his rubbing immediately stopped.

"Nita! Do you need anything?"

I nodded like a toddler. In my defense I was still half-asleep and really tired.

He waited.

"Bathroom," I said, simply and quietly. Brady smiled a little, but it looked like a struggle.

"The last door down the other hall."

I nodded and turned to leave when Brady's warm hand caught my arm.

"Are you alright?" he asked and looked me once over. I didn't say anything for a moment. I just looked at Brady, and opened my mouth to say something and closed it again. I wanted to say something about Jennifer, and get some of the jealousy that was raging in my belly out, but I didn't dare. Yet.

Finally, I cleared my throat.

"Yeah. I'm fine," I lied, and forced a tight smile, "I just really need to go to the bathroom."

Brady narrowed his eyes; he obviously caught my falsehood.

"Is there any news about Sarah?" I asked changing the subject.

Brady shook his head.

Suddenly, another door swung open and Lucas stepped out.

"Nita!" he looked surprised to see me, too. What was with these people? They had to know someone brought me home.

"How'd you get home?" Lucas asked.

"I don't know… someone brought me. I woke up on the couch."

Brady and Lucas exchanged a glance.

"Oh? Where did you go before you came home?"

"The woods."

Brady dashed out the hall and into the room I was just in and gave a loud, rough growl, enough to stir everyone in the house. I couldn't see him, but I started to go in that direction when Lucas's arm snaked around my waist.

"No, don't. Not yet."

More people flowed into the room. I heard a screen door open and a tearing sound, but that was it. Lucas let go of me and I dashed into the living room.

People everywhere were talking heatedly, so they didn't notice me walk in. I heard the small metallic beep of my phone and walked to it.

**Max: Get home safely?**

I shrieked in surprise and dropped my phone. It hit the ground with a loud crash.

Several individuals clustered around me. Sam picked up the phone and read the message.

"Who's Max?"

"My ex."

"Your ex," he repeated, and I nodded.

He started to say something but thought better of it and looked up tenderly at me.

"Why don't you rest? You had a long day," he suggested.

"I want to go somewhere," I answered stubbornly.

"You can't," he argued back.

"And why the hell not?"

"Because I said so."

They were expecting a retort, but I gave in quickly and sat on a different couch while they continued to bustle around the room and talk in hushed tones. As soon as they were all busy, I silently got up and was carefully advancing to the door when a russet shape blocked me.

"Sorry, Ne. Can't let you out," said Jared.

I moved to one side and he mimicked me. I moved to the other, and then the other. This was just childish; there was no way I could get around him.

"Ple-e-e-ease," I whined, but Jared just shook his head. I sighed and turned around. It's not like I could've barreled through him. He was double my size in weight and height, like a monkey and a gorilla. Or a dog and a wolf. And for once, I was the weaker one.

I stubbornly plopped onto the couch and crossed my arms. My eyes followed everyone's moves. Sam was staring nervously in the woods and Jared was still blocking the door, but Kim pranced over and joined him. I looked around more, but it seemed as if most of them had left all in a pack. Poor Emily looked frightened out of her mind.

I wonder why?

Maybe she was just really freaked out about the text, though I don't see what the big deal is. But I'll find out.

**Just a filler! Don't work a lot more is coming…. Why do I feel like I'm losing my touch? **** oh well. Also, i want songs that you want to hear... so favirotes anyone? Its getting harder and harder to think of some...  
><strong>

**REVIEW!**


	10. Say Hello to Goodbye

**A/N: Sorry I haven't updated in a while. School has been C-R-A-Z-Y and I've had swimming! Luckily its over! ! I LOVE all the reviews I have gotten so keep it up! And songs! PM or I'm or whatever you call the massaging thingy or review what songs you like…it'd be very helpful. I THINK that's all…**

**Disclaimer: I am not Stefanie Meyer.**

**IMPORTANT A/N AT THE BOTTOM! **

Chapter 9

_Say hello to goodbye, cause' it's gone forever  
>No more try, you and I<br>Not now, not ever  
>And I'll get by without you<br>I'm not going back again  
>I'm not going to lie to you<br>Cause, that was there and only then.  
>-Say hello to Goodbye by Shontelle<em>

"Where are you going?" I asked as Brady, Lucas, and Jared tip-toed to the back screen door. They were probably hoping I wouldn't look up from one of the magazines Emily gave me, and notice them.

The boys stopped dead in their tracks, and Jared straightened his back while clearing his throat, obviously caught.

"Just… out."

"Hmm?" I hummed, "Out where?"

"Uh…"

"Can I go out, too?" I asked with the same nonchalance in my voice but my voice involuntarily speed up at the end, and my insides turned over excitedly waiting to hear the outcome. I didn't go to school today under strict orders from Sam, so I've been cooped up in this house for hours. I finally knew what chickens felt like, lying in a barb-wired metal houses doing nothing but sitting in their own poop, which in my case, was my thoughts. It wouldn't be so bad if I was outside thinking. It just seemed too claustrophobic in the small cabin watching the rest of the people come and go as they pleased.

Jared looked over to Brady and something unrecognizable passed through the two boys. Brady looked over to Lucas. A few long moments passed as Brady turned to gaze directly out the door and into the forest, staring intently at the trees, inspecting them like a lion looking for prey. Finally he turned back to Jared and gave him a short, curt nod.

"Really?" I asked. With the day I was having, this was too good to be true.

"Yeah, really."

My excitement mellowed down to a small buzz as Jared said those words. He sounded tired, like he hadn't slept in a long time but what good would it do if I questioned him? He probably wouldn't tell me a thing. I was having a hard time deciding who had more secrets; me or them.

"Alright," I murmured, "Thanks."

Jared grunted and the boys with-drew to the door and sauntered into the forest.

The forest.

Everything comes back to the forest.

But now was not the time to think about that.

I slipped of the stool I was sitting on, and my feet gave a soft thud as they hit the wood floor.

Fixing my eyes on the forest I traveled out the house.

I started out in a walk, then a fast trot. I switched into a quick run, breaking out into a full on sprint until I was fully under the protection of the trees.

I slowed down a little to catch my breath and walked off the trail into uncharted territory.

I never remembered being told that Septembers in La Push were this cold. I never remembered being told how long the mountains went on, or how easy it was to make friends and loved ones—but I did remember how easy it was to have them slip through your fingers, floating somewhere between being so suffocatingly close you can almost feel them, to the point where you could barely remember their faces.

I couldn't decide which was worse.

Sarah had a whole life ahead of her. She had friends, and a loving family. But all that was gone now.

Poof.

Disappeared.

Leaving me alone, friendless and out to fend for myself again.

And what did Sarah ever do? She was a perfect friend; almost impossible to hate except for the expectation of Jennifer.

If only Brady saw her like I did. I had only one happy moment with Jennifer and that was when my fist pummeled into her head. I had yet to have a memory to top that. In fact, it was probably the happiest memory sense I _came_ to La Push.

Before I came here, I was alright. I wasn't exactly joyous, but I wasn't that sad either. It was bearable.

But as soon as our car stopped in front of our—Ana's—new house that all changed. Like a sudden, silent switch in the atmosphere. I didn't feel it or hear it but somehow it was there because sense then everything has gone downhill.

My feet stopped in a sudden halt as the loud crack of a branch breaking pierced through the quite forest.

I sharply whipped around only to find nothing behind me but a broken stick. I veered back but all I saw was a faint blur which was followed by an immediate sickeningly sweet smell.

I whirled back around when I heard it.

Growling.

So I ran.

And ran.

Until I was safely back in the cottage with the door firmly slammed shut behind me and then I picked up a book and read. Even when everyone arrived home, I read. When they asked how my walk was I didn't tell them what happened. How could I? So instead I gave them a typical answer about how beautiful the forest is this time of year.

But I know what I saw.

They didn't tell me they had wolves.

Very big wolves.

**A/N: Hey guys, so I have a lot of stuff going on right now and it will be a little while before i get the next chapter in! I'll try to get it in soon but i think maybe early september will be the earliest! Thanks for understanding :)**

**REVIEWS. Even if i cant post they make my day :) **


	11. Someone Like You

**A/N: Sorry it's been forever guys! I promise to post a lot again like I did in the beginning. Its been a crazy couple months and when I did have time to write I kept feeling like I either A) had writers block or B) what I wrote wasn't good enough. And my real life has been crazy. I have also been working on a lot of personal works.**

**THIS CHAPTER HAS NOT BEEN BETA'D but Hope this lives up! I wanted to post this so much I couldn't wait. I'll update all the mistakes soon. –G**

Chapter 11

_I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited_

_But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it_

_I had hoped you'd see my face and be reminded_

_That for me it isn't over_

_Never mind I'll find someone like you_

_I wish nothing but the best for you, too_

_Don't forget me, I begged, I remember you said_

_Sometimes it lasts in love and sometimes it hurts instead_

_-Someone Like You by Adele_

My eyes shot open before jagged, yellow teeth consumed my flesh. Beads of sweat made my tank top cling to my body uncomfortably and made me sticky.

Franticly I took a wild look around the room. I didn't know where I was. Oh no, _Oh God_, no.

_At Emily's, _my inner voice soothed.

Gradually, my breathing slowed and my chest stopped heaving. Unfortunately, I was still sticky.

Very sticky.

I was placed in a different bedroom than I was originally in. I seemed to have a knack for waking up in places I didn't know. I laughed hollowly to myself; I probably shouldn't make that a habit.

Automatically my hand flew up to my dog tags.

What I really wanted though, was a shower but I also really didn't want to go outside. One look at me and they would know something was wrong and I had no idea where the bathroom is anymore.

After a while in the new bed, the stink of my sweat got to me, and I ventured outside the room. There was a short hall to the right and the room was the last one closest to the end of the wall with a little mirror.

I didn't need to look to know I looked like complete crap but I looked anyway. My hair was messy but not as uncontrollable as it could've been which was the best thing that happened today so far. My eyes weren't bloodshot anymore but there were bags under my eyes. The cheek where Ana hit me wasn't red and puffy anymore, and was instead replaced with black and blue purplish bruises. _Great. _

Someone cleared their throat loudly and, excuse me, very rudely. I whirled around to see Sam standing a few feet behind me.

Sam cleared his throat again, nervously this time.

"Uh, Emily just wanted to say that she, um, has food ready if you're hungry now."

"Thanks, Sam."

He nodded and started to turn away before turning back to me.

"And…um, I bet she, uh, has some of that… cover make-up thing…you know, if you, uh, want it."

I nodded again and repeated my thanks, but my insides were screaming as I followed him down the hall. Did my face really look that bad?

I twisted my dog tags again, as I was led into the over crowded kitchen. And when I mean over crowded, I meant _over crowded._

Emily was bustling around in the kitchen flickering from checking on Kim, who was doing the dishes, to cleaning every mite of dust off the counter, to Jared, Quil, and a guy named Jacob ,who where arguing in the middle of the room across a small table.

Sam hurriedly jumped into the conversation; I think to get away from me.

"Are you alright, dear?"

I turned to look at Emily, and gave her a faint smile. "Yes, yes of course. Is there, uh, anything I can do to, um, help?"

Emily laughed loudly and Sam's eye's flicked over to his fiancé.

"There is _always _something you can do to help. With these guys," she jerked a thumb to the table, "if nothing else, you can always make more food. They eat like big, hungry wolves."

Emily laughed again but this time I didn't find it that funny. Memories from my dream lest night crept back into my mind and I shivered. My gaze caught Sam's right as Emily thrust a cloth into my hand. I looked down at the limp material in my hands.

"Uh…"

"Just clean up the counter," Emily tapped the stone once a brought some more dishes to the sink for Kim to cleanup.

I nodded; I've been nodding a lot of that lately. I started wiping the counter when I felt eyes penetrate my back. I met Sam's stare for what seemed like the hundredth time when Emily came over to help me.

We worked in silence for a little bit.

"Does he—I mean, uh, does _he_ like me?"

Emily looked over her shoulder to gaze lovingly at her fiancé.

"Sam is very difficult to figure out—even I have a tough time sometimes, but… I think he doesn't _mind_ you," Emily whispered in hushed tones, "Why?"

I shrugged.

"It's just awkward, I guess."

Emily nodded and that was the end of that conversation.

A few minutes later I heard the door close and that same high-pitched, whiny voice I dreaded to hear.

"Oh my god! What the hell happened to your _face_?"

I rolled my eyes as Lucas growled from somewhere behind Jennifer. Lucas stepped into the kitchen and I smiled warmly as he made his way closer to me. Tucking a piece of hair behind my ear I turned back to wiping the counter and tried to pretend he wasn't behind me.

"Whatcha doing?"

I smiled a ducked my head lower, concentrating very hard on a stain in the rust colored granite.

"What does it look like I'm doing?"

He chuckled under his breath. "Turn around," he commanded, and I did as I was told. Once upon a time, I would've never have listened when someone commanded me to do something but now it was different.

Lucas was closer to me than I expected, but when I tried to take a step back, the granite made it impossible.

We stood there, staring into each other's eyes for an immeasurable amount of time until, for the second time today, some one cleared their throat.

But this time it wasn't Sam.

Oh, no.

It was Brady.

Shoot me now.

Lucas grinned cheekily and took a step closer to Brady, while I tried to hide myself behind my tangled hair.

No one said anything for a while and I started to notice how there was no one in the room anymore, including Jennifer.

"Is there something you need?" asked Lucas.

"Nita, can you pass me the salt?" Brady answered in return but his beautiful eyes never left his brother. His tone was civil but there was a sharper edge to it this time but i repressed my shiver.

I quickly gathered the salt that was at the other side of the kitchen but stood, unsurely in the corner.

I mean, should I give him it? It didn't seem like it had to be _that _urgent if Lucas and him could have a mini showdown.

"Nita, _please pass me the salt."_

I gulped. Maybe it was.

"No Nita, don't pass it to him. He can get it himself," Lucas intervened.

"Nita, give it to me."

Well, now I was in trouble.

**A/N: Should Nita give in? Leave me a review!**


	12. Paradise Part I

**A/N: Hey guys! I was GOING to wait until tomorrow to post this other chapter but because its hard to get what i was talking about in the last chapter i decided to put this up. And its shorter than normal so i guess its not a _real real _chapter. Anyway check out the new character on my profile! (her name is Danie-you'll meet her soon)! **

**THIS CHAPTER IS NOT YET BETA'D!**

**Because i got a few PMs on the importance of the salt shaker: The salt shaker itself isn't really important, its more like if she gives the salt shaker to Brady she would be doing what he says and if she gives it to Lucas it would be doing what he says. I EXPLAIN IT IN MORE DETAIL IN THE CHAPTER. **

**-G**

* * *

><p>Chapter 12<p>

_When she was just a girl_

_She expected the world_

_But it flew away from her reach_

_and the bullets catch in her teeth_

_Life goes on, it gets so heavy_

_The wheel breaks the butterfly_

_Every tear a waterfall_

_In the night the stormy night she'll close her eyes_

_In the night the stormy night away she'd fly_

_-Paradise by Coldplay_

"_Nita, give it to me."_

_Well, now I was in trouble. _

I stood there gaping, torn between to incredible guys, brothers. One that didn't love me enough, and the other one that liked me too much. It was a position that I wouldn't wish on anyone.

Either way I'd lose. If I gave the salt to Brady it would mean I was giving in to him, it would give _me _away. And he had Jennifer. I didn't want to be the "other girl." I could never be that "other girl." It would break what little sanity I have left in me.

If I didn't give Brady the salt I would be giving into Lucas, and it was hard to imagine that I would ever be completely over Brady, "other girl" or not. And I've always hated the girls that string boys along just for the attention, but were always after someone else. I'm not that kind of girl, am I?

If I was a good girl, I would just leave, that's the other option. Leave before anyone else gets hurt. But, I'm not a good girl.

I'm too selfish.

I looked at the saltshaker in my hand. How could such a little thing hold so much meaning?

I'm selfish.

I'd rather be loved by someone I don't love, than be loved by no one at all.

I placed the saltshaker back on the table.

I'm selfish.

I stepped closer to Lucas.

When me 'family' broke apart and I was walking alone and hurt, it was Lucas that found me. Not Brady. Incredible, funny Lucas. I could be happy with him.

Then why does it feel that my heart was shattering into a million pieces?

Brady has a girlfriend. And as bitchy and horrible as she is, as much as it kills me to see them together, as much as the pain I feel hurts, I wont stop them.

It will kill me, but I wont be my mother. I wont steal him away.

But I don't want to be alone.

I'm selfish.

My body felt heavy, to heavy to support the world I was carrying on my shoulders. The pain causing through my pains was almost to the boiling point of unbearable but I looked up to Brady's blank face but his eyes, his beautiful eyes, betrayed him. I betrayed him. But, I wont be strung along like a puppet. Though, isn't that what I'm about to do to Lucas? I won't stay with him. I know that, he doesn't. It's for the best.

It would kill me to watch Jennifer and Brady, knowing that I can have none of it.

I am hurt.

I am strong.

I am selfish.

I am not the same.

I will give up.

For once in my life, I will give into the pain, and I will welcome the darkness. I will let the weight on my shoulders crush me.

All so I will be loved.

The things we do for love.

I will not be my mother.

I am selfish but I am strong.

Brady walked slowly over to the table next to me and plucked the saltshaker off the table. I willed myself not to look away from his beautiful eyes. He searched my face.

"Brady!" Jennifer called from the other room. Jennifer. Different emotions played in his eyes like fireworks. He stood up straighter. He was about to leave.

I will not look away though; I will not give in.

I _will_ find my paradise but not with Lucas and as much as it killed me to know, not with Brady.

That's what hurts the most.

Brady turned around and slowly walked away.

I closed my eyes and tried to remember paradise.

But all I could think of was him.

**A/N: So, i forgot to say this but HAPPY HOLIDAYS! I think the next chap will be up Friday-ish (maybe a day or two before maybe a day or two after) **

**Leave me a review! You know i love em! **


	13. Paradise Part II

**A/N: So, this is a confusing chapter, but I posted just like I promised!. If you haven't checked out Coldplay's **_**Paradise **_**video yet, I suggest you do. I kinda love it. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own twilight. If I did, I'd be having tea with J.K Rowling and L.J Smith in my polka dotted mansion somewhere on an island in Europe. Just Saying.**

**Next Post: A week. I hope. **

Chapter 13

_When she was just a girl_

_She expected the world_

_But it flew away from her reach_

_So she ran away in her sleep_

_Dreamed of para- para- paradise_

_Para- para- paradise_

_Para- para- paradise_

_Every time she closed her eyes_

_Whoa-oh-oh oh-oooh oh-oh-oh_

_-Paradise by Coldplay_

* * *

><p><em>Brady turned around and slowly walked away. <em>

_I closed my eyes and tried to remember paradise. _

_But all I could think of was him…_

Suddenly the kitchen felt too small, claustrophobic even, yet at the same time it felt way too big, like I could get lost in the space. That, I recognized, was the feeling of being trapped.

My eyes darted frantically from wall to wall. I briefly at stared every surface I could see; the table, the cups, plates, windows, chairs, spoons, forks, and knives, looking for a way out, before finally settling on the only living thing within eyesight.

Lucas.

Except he was looking way to dumfounded with happiness to notice my slight panic attack.

Didn't he know we were trapped like a bird in a cage? That we couldn't go anywhere?

Except, we could go anywhere. This was Emily's kitchen. We could leave anytime we wanted. The door was right there.

So, I did.

I left.

I walked out of the kitchen, past Sam and Emily cuddling on the couch, past Jared and Kim laughing at something out the window, past Brady and Jennifer watching a T.V. show.

Brady looked up curiously at my retreating figure but I didn't acknowledge him. I couldn't. Not yet.

I just walked straight forward, out of the house, and slammed the door. I followed the path to the main road and I walked. And walked.

Maybe minutes, maybe hours. I didn't stop, even when it started to rain, and I didn't know where I was going. I just followed my instinct, and let my feet carry me away.

Until my feet suddenly stopped, did I really know where I was.

I didn't like the blue and white house anymore than I did the day when I first saw it.

But I needed my brother.

The small path that led to either the worst, or best, mistake of my life took miles to walk, but somehow I ended up on the porch I vowed I would never return to again. I lifted my fist and knocked once, twice, three times, on the white wooden door. I was well aware of how soggy I was from the rain and of the bruised on my face, the swelling, and the yellowish bruises on my arms that I got from my first day at school from my fight with Jennifer. But this was "home," it shouldn't matter if I looked like crap.

I waited, and the door swung open.

By Ana.

"Nita!" She gasped, fakely. Keanu must be nearby.

Ana roughly pulled me against her, into the hallway, shutting the door while she did so. Her fingernails clawed at my back and she squeezed me much to tight. It was a relief when Ana let go and Keanu bundled me up in his arms.

I hated Ana.

And I loved Derek.

But _no one_, I repeat_, no one _gives better hugs than Keanu.

Being wrapped up in my brothers arms, something cracked in my steel resolve, and just like that, the floodgates were wide open until he was almost as wet as I was. There was so much I wanted to tell that I couldn't. So much that I wanted to tell _anybody. _

"Shhh, Ne, its alright. You're here now," he soothed in my ear and smoothed my hair back over and over again, like you might do with a dog.

I sniffled and straightened up; the universal symbol to stop hugging someone.

"I'm tired," I whispered when Keanu wouldn't let go. Reluctantly, he let go of me, but he followed when I walked up the stairs and opened the door to my bedroom.

"I'm sorry, Ne," he rushed out, "we didn't know if you'd be coming back or…"

I put up my hand to stop him.

"I understand," I said quietly, looking at all the boxes. They were the same as when I left, but now there was a few more added in.

Twisting on my heal I numbly went further up, toward the attic.

As soon as I was fully in the room, I shut the small door and pulled a box on top of it so Keanu wouldn't be able to get in.

Sometimes a girl just needed her alone time.

I deserved that at least.

No matter how much I wanted or needed my brother.

Tiredly I plopped onto the air mattress but not before something caught my eye.

The wolf figurine.

I grabbed it greedily and ran my hands onto the cold material.

Gently, I laid my head on the pillow and watched the rain, with the wolf in my hands, until I fell asleep.


End file.
